By Tammy Taylor
Conflicts drain your energy and create extreme stress, sometimes to the point where you just want to throw your hands up and quit!
- We can look for conflict
- Create conflict
- Ignore conflict
- Or, we can confront conflict, and stop conflict!
Confronting conflicts and then stopping them will enable you to be happier in your Salon:
- Whether you are the Salon owner
- An independent
- Or, an employee
To eliminate these blow-ups you must confront the problem immediately, without anger or aggression.
- Visualize and roll play peaceful outcomes before you start talking. I always pray about it first.
- If you go into the conversation aggressively, it will escalate the problem to the point of no return.
This is not what you want to happen. Wouldn’t you rather stay in one place, be happy, get along and be the person that says: “the conflict stops here”.
Moving to a different Salon does not usually mean things are going to be better. It just means different faces, and with a whole new set of problems.
I have seen many salons split up over a small conflict that escalated way out of control; and half of the staff gets talked into leaving and going to a new Salon. Then the owner is left with half of the staff and says “forget it”, and closes down.
A Salon is like a family: If one person asks only a select few to go to lunch or a party and someone is left out; feelings are hurt. Being part of a family or Salon means always thinking about your actions and how they affect everyone around you. Just like leaving someone out, this could escalate into a huge battle if it is not talked about and resolved immediately!
Maybe you were the one left out and, if so, you have two choices:
- Tell them your feelings were hurt even though you know it is silly, and be able to laugh at yourself.
- Forgive them, let it go and never think about it again.
If you were the one who hurt the other persons’ feelings, say you are sorry, and you will let them buy lunch today to help them feel better!
NO, not really… just say you are sorry and be more considerate next time.
Now, this scenario might sound petty or ridiculous but; I have seen families, marriages and Salons split up over things like this. It is never the big “stuff”, because those are the things we talk about. It is always the little things that cause the biggest conflict!
Have you or someone you know ever acted badly towards someone in the Salon?
- Have you ever ignored them?
- Made little remarks behind their backs?
- Excluded them from lunches or parties?
- If so, this is where it starts!
This bad behavior not only creates stress on the person receiving the bad treatment, but it puts even more stress on the person giving it.
- Being angry and mean takes so much energy out of us.
- We might think we are torturing the other person; but we are actually torturing ourselves and it starts affecting everyone around us.
Every day our job will be less fun and our work will start slowly going downhill, until we want to quit. So, do not let this happen to you or to your Salon.
- If you see it, stop it!
- If you are doing it, stop it!
- If you are receiving it, stop it!
The number one Salon Golden Rule: Do not trash talk about anyone!
- If everyone just followed this very important rule in the Salon, 90% of all conflicts would never escalate.
- But if one person listens to the trash talk…
The “Conflict Snowball” starts rolling until it is out of control!
How you can stop it is really simple: Do not listen or show any interest, and just walk away.
- Never repeat what you heard to anyone, especially to the person talked about.
- Take care of your own business and make lots of money; because if you are busy there is no time for anything else.
If you really do not like someone or they do not like you because your behaviors are irritating to both of you, get to know each other better and try to understand why each of you is acting this way. There are usually only a couple of reasons, and 90% of the time it is:
- Or personal problems.
- These problems are easy to remedy if you talk about them and don’t take anything personal.
So How Can We Talk About It:
The Salon is a very busy place and there is usually no privacy. Even if there is a little room and you go in there with someone, everyone else will be wondering what is going on and ask a million questions. So:
- Book a paying service with the person you need to talk to.
- Have your conversation while getting your service done.
This will give you the privacy needed, and it is better to spend a little money on a service than to spend a lot of money on moving to a new Salon or closing down your business!
Remember that resolution is always better for everyone:
- It is never too late until someone ends up quitting
- Getting fired
- Or closing the business.
Do not let this pass the point of no return:
- And do not let this happen to you
- To your Salon
- Or, to someone you care about!